I needed a mother,
A guiding voice,
Amongst this darkness,
Where were you?
I needed a mother,
A guiding voice,
Amongst this darkness,
Where were you?
An ocean sprang up in your wake,
To send me drowning in tears,
I wonder what you’d think,
Of the ruins you left behind,
If they haunt you in your afterlife,
Or are they my sins to bear?
I needed you,
Hell, I waited for you,
But you never showed,
Was it because I wasn’t enough?
I have so much I wish I could talk to you about,
So many stories to share and memories to make;
I wish I could tell you about my first day at work,
Or how I’ve been thinking of learning something new,
How I followed your advice and saw more of the world.
I’d even talk to you about the weather when I ran out of news to share.
Hear you chuckle and reminisce over days gone by,
Share a table outside on your bench, a cup of tea in hand,
We’d watch the world float by on clouds,
I’d give anything to hear you over the silence I’ve had since you left.
Sitting across from me,
Palms on the table,
Eyes blank and searching,
I wish you’d just say it,
Tell me you’re sorry,
Even if you’re not,
So we can try again.
I am an option,
One you’ll tire of,
When another of yours,
Posts a sexier photo than I.
Let sunshine fill my days,
May I bottle it, keep a jar,
For a rainy day that drowns me,
May the rays keep me warm,
Until I find the right path to be on.
The forgiveness and love I give,
So freely to others in abundance,
I deserve to give to myself too.
Honey, it’s okay,
You can ignore it,
It’s only my heart.
I yield,
As soft as clay,
An unnamed victory.