I have so much I wish I could talk to you about,
So many stories to share and memories to make;
I wish I could tell you about my first day at work,
Or how I’ve been thinking of learning something new,
How I followed your advice and saw more of the world.
I’d even talk to you about the weather when I ran out of news to share.
Hear you chuckle and reminisce over days gone by,
Share a table outside on your bench, a cup of tea in hand,
We’d watch the world float by on clouds,
I’d give anything to hear you over the silence I’ve had since you left.
Sitting across from me,
Palms on the table,
Eyes blank and searching,
I wish you’d just say it,
Tell me you’re sorry,
Even if you’re not,
So we can try again.
I am an option,
One you’ll tire of,
When another of yours,
Posts a sexier photo than I.
Towards the end of last year, I learnt the valuable lesson in self-care by staying firm with my boundaries, even at the risk of conflict and saying goodbye to a few people in my life. This year seems to be a fight and a test of strength, but if it’s taught me anything, it’s that I can heal and celebrate my inner child.
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Let sunshine fill my days,
May I bottle it, keep a jar,
For a rainy day that drowns me,
May the rays keep me warm,
Until I find the right path to be on.
Am I tied to a place-
That sends me sinking,
Into an abyss of self-loathing,
A weight in the pit of my stomach,
Knowing I don’t belong here.
The forgiveness and love I give,
So freely to others in abundance,
I deserve to give to myself too.
My voice is strangled,
Words cut off from the source,
I wish so much to tell you things,
But if I do, I wonder what you’ll think-
Of me by the end.